So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
You can't motorboat a personality
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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