Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
