two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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