so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
