I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize