Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Randomize
