I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
