Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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