Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
