i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
