..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
