I want to walk on stilts...naked
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
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