I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
