I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Everything about him screamed your future.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
