you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize
