So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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