i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
