marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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