I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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