Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize