At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize