I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Dick very happy bro
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
