Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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