handjob tips. give me some.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize