we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
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