I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
