you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
