I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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