remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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