we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
