There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
