You're my little dorito
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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