But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
