Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
