We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize