I seem to have left my pride at pride
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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