So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize
