I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Randomize
