oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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