I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
