Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
