Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I supernannyed him into submission
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
