The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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