She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
