piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
