Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Semen is not good for contacts.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
