This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize