Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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