How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
