you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
