If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
